Flashback to the matzo balls I ate 25 years ago when my mom got married. 25 years later I remember I liked them a lot. I swear, I have a love affair with food.
So I was remembering the matzo ball soup. I remembered having them after my moms wedding. She got married in Anaheim at a wedding chapel. Chapel was cheesy lame. I think the only people on "her" side were us kids. Her hubby had his family there, and his friends. Probably less than 20 people total. Certainly not a dream wedding. There was a big wedding cake in the foyer. I think it was made of plaster. It was there so people could take a picture next to it.
The reception was us going to my moms husbands friends' house. the wife made the soup. Everyone but the kids (my brothers and i) spoke English as a second language.
I think that's why when I asked the lady what the matzo balls were, she didn't say "matzo balls." she scanned her brain and came up with cracker crumbs. The lady was thin, pale. She had short blonde hair. She drank a little wine, and was talking and to make a point, slammed her wineglass down and broke the stem. Her husband got mad that she was drunk.
My mom came to America with my dad. He left her for another Japanese lady. She had 3 of us kids, and no husband. She was too ashamed to go back to Japan, so she lied to her parents that everything was fine. Whenever they asked where my dad was, she'd say he was bowling. (for 10 years) So no family flew in from Japan to see her get married for the second time. After she remarried, I think she broke the news to her family.
I never thought about it, but I thought how sad. How sad to have a shitty little wedding with no one there but your kids. My mom is really pretty, always has been, and I remember she didn't look pretty on the day of her wedding. I didn't like the dress, and I didn't like her hair. She had a lot of flowers in her hair. There's a picture of all of us. I didn't like my dress, or my hair either. It was the eighties.
25 years ago, and I still remember I like matzo balls. Every once in a while, I see them pre made in a big jar at the store. I want to buy them, but they're in chicken broth, so I don't. I thought about making them, but never did, being so afraid of the unknown. Partly because i'm not for sure they were matzo balls. lady never called them that.
me: I like this. What are these?
she: Cracker crumbs.
my poor mom. she said she didn't want to get old alone. far as i can tell, marriage ain't no guarantee you won't. its love that keeps a person sticking around. not a peice of paper. or ring.
she and 2nd hubby are divorced. he still loves her. has the housekey. comes over every day when she's at work, and makes her food so she can eat when she comes home. she doesn't eat much. she's very skinny. I did not get that gene.
what pisses me off is that my mom is still in love with my dad. a guy who dumped her in a country where she couldn't even speak the language, while she was pregnant, and had two toddlers. wasn't even there to see his son born.
meanwhile, hubby #2, who she treats like shit comes over and makes her dinner every night. He's gone by the time she comes home. He packs little foil packets of vitamins for her to take.
A couple of years ago, my mom said she wanted to change her name back to my dads last name. I was so pissed. I told her if she did, I was changing my last name to a matriarchial name I made up.
I figured my dad hadn't raised me, why should I carry his name?
I put together my 2 grandma's first name, and my great grandma's and my moms first name.
If my mom changes her name back to my dads last name, then my last name will be Mumida. My dad named me, obviously, as my mom didn't know any American names. So if I were to change my name legally, I'd be Nadia Mumida.
Nadia Azusa Mumida.
I asked my mom what she would have named me in Japanese had she been the one to name me. She said Azusa.
posted by Tampons and Ramen @ 10:02 PM
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